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My cousin’s in town for spring break, which means I do now, officially talk to people on my dad’s side of the family other than my siblings and nephews. We met for the first time since we were tiny Fishlets while I was in Alabama this winter, and we envited her hither.
As with all family visits, we feel compelled to drag her to a different cultually, historically, or geologically significant site every day she’s here, out of politeness sake. She’s asleep in the downstairs room right now. Poor woman, I think we overdosed her.
Anyway, today, she and my mom went to Kasha-Katuwe Tent Rocks National Monument while I ran errands and made dog food. After they got back, I was supposed to take my cousin down to the university to show it off, I guess (it was Mom’s idea) and down to Old Town, the Spanish colonial era city plaza, but of course every store I went to had something I needed out of stock, and the library called to tell me to pick up my book, and... Well, by the time I got home, it was late in the afternoon, and I heaved a sigh of relief that they weren’t home yet. I quick ran inside and called them to tell them not to hurry home, because I was running way late.
FISH: *dials Mom*
MOM’S CELL PHONE: Your call has been transferred to an automa-
FISH: *hangs up*
PHONE: *rings*
FISH: Hello?
MOM’S CELL PHONE: Are you still there?
FISH: Holy shit!
MOM’S CELL PHONE: press one to leave one to leave a message, or two to disconnect!
FISH: *pounds the one key again and again and again and again...*
MOM’S CELL PHONE: Good bye!
I put the phone back in its cradle like it was made of a primary explosive and tiptoed away gingerly. Holding my breath. When I got back to the counter, I thought I was safe.
FISH: Whew!
PHONE: *rings*
FISH: Oh my God, it’s possessed! *reaches for it*
FISH’S HANDS: *tremble*
FISH: Hello?
MOM: Oh good, you’re home.
FISH: Heheh, this isn’t some new trick of your demoniac messaging service, is it?
MOM: Are you alright, Honey?
FISH: Heheh, yeah... Sure...
Mom and I exchanged pleasantries, and I started to calm down, because she knew things only Mom knew (like where she was going with my cousin). Of course, the phone demon could have been reading my mind... Hadn’t thought of that.
MOM: Well, anyway, I called to say we’re running late, and we’re not going to be home for a while, and um, I’m so sorry, but you’re going to have to take your cousin to Old Town another day.
FISH: Oh good!
MOM: Well if that’s the way you feel about it...
It’s dad’s turn to take us somewhere tomorrow. *rubs hands with glee*
As with all family visits, we feel compelled to drag her to a different cultually, historically, or geologically significant site every day she’s here, out of politeness sake. She’s asleep in the downstairs room right now. Poor woman, I think we overdosed her.
Anyway, today, she and my mom went to Kasha-Katuwe Tent Rocks National Monument while I ran errands and made dog food. After they got back, I was supposed to take my cousin down to the university to show it off, I guess (it was Mom’s idea) and down to Old Town, the Spanish colonial era city plaza, but of course every store I went to had something I needed out of stock, and the library called to tell me to pick up my book, and... Well, by the time I got home, it was late in the afternoon, and I heaved a sigh of relief that they weren’t home yet. I quick ran inside and called them to tell them not to hurry home, because I was running way late.
FISH: *dials Mom*
MOM’S CELL PHONE: Your call has been transferred to an automa-
FISH: *hangs up*
PHONE: *rings*
FISH: Hello?
MOM’S CELL PHONE: Are you still there?
FISH: Holy shit!
MOM’S CELL PHONE: press one to leave one to leave a message, or two to disconnect!
FISH: *pounds the one key again and again and again and again...*
MOM’S CELL PHONE: Good bye!
I put the phone back in its cradle like it was made of a primary explosive and tiptoed away gingerly. Holding my breath. When I got back to the counter, I thought I was safe.
FISH: Whew!
PHONE: *rings*
FISH: Oh my God, it’s possessed! *reaches for it*
FISH’S HANDS: *tremble*
FISH: Hello?
MOM: Oh good, you’re home.
FISH: Heheh, this isn’t some new trick of your demoniac messaging service, is it?
MOM: Are you alright, Honey?
FISH: Heheh, yeah... Sure...
Mom and I exchanged pleasantries, and I started to calm down, because she knew things only Mom knew (like where she was going with my cousin). Of course, the phone demon could have been reading my mind... Hadn’t thought of that.
MOM: Well, anyway, I called to say we’re running late, and we’re not going to be home for a while, and um, I’m so sorry, but you’re going to have to take your cousin to Old Town another day.
FISH: Oh good!
MOM: Well if that’s the way you feel about it...
It’s dad’s turn to take us somewhere tomorrow. *rubs hands with glee*
