attackfish

Summery: : 300 words of krak

Disclaimer: if I owned these fellows, my account would be paid

Actually, it's a Cephalopod

“Well, we ain’t original Scandinavians, are we?” Pintel shot back.

Ragetti just opened his mouth to retort when a great and terrifying ship swooped up under them. As the water washed overboard, the two pirates found themselves stranded on the ship’s damp deck. The captain strode up to them, his tentacles lashing. “It’s Kray-ken,” he squished, “And it’s Greek!”

A rope fell between the three. Jack slid down with unintended swiftness, and at the bottom blew on his rope burned hands. “How did he get here?” Regetti demanded.

Pintel stared, “Don’t ask!”

“Actually,” chirped Jack, “It’s Scandinavian, and it’s Kraaaaw-kon.”

***

Petty Tyranny

A few months before landing in Port Royal in Anamaria’s sinking boat

Jack handed Tia Dalma a bouquet of flowers. “Dese you’re payment?” she snapped. Jack grinned as the blossoms started biting her fingers and breathing tongues of flame. “De payment is fair,” she conceded.

“I want information,” he gesticulated, “a way to show up and or prove yon squidy sea caption scholastically inferior.” His debt would be coming in soon, and he wanted to poke Davy Jones a bit before the kraken dragged him down to the locker.

“Davy tinks de kraken of his is Greek.”

“It isn’t?”

“It’s a Viking beasty.”

Jack’s hands twitched as he stumbled away from her.

***

Nordic Beauty

The odor of rotting fish filled Jack’s throat and nostrils as the kraken expelled saliva and impossibly awful breath onto him. He struggled twisted in the bonds, cursing Elizabeth.

“I always liked you,” he attempted, “Strong Viking invertebrate that you are, what capable,” he grimaced, “jaw muscles you have.”

Whatever charm Jack possessed, it wasn’t to the kraken’s taste, which roared and gripped him, mast and all. The monster snapped him away from the ship. “You’re beautiful, I hope your quarry has told you that before, a Nordic beauty.” The kraken ruffled his hair affectionately as it pulled him under.