I understand where you come from and your point. It's just...I need some reassurance. Reassurance that death isn't bad, it's part of life, and it's not terrible, but...calming. That the pain can go away, and I can be free.
But only when the pain is terrible, which it hasn't been in a long time for me. Thank God. So no, I am not suicidical anymore. ^^
It doesn't really feel like giving up to me. Like the last spit to the face of my tormentors, that they can't hurt me anymore, that I am free...
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branchandroot
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Date: 2011-11-21 07:43 pm (UTC)I understand where you come from and your point. It's just...I need some reassurance. Reassurance that death isn't bad, it's part of life, and it's not terrible, but...calming. That the pain can go away, and I can be free.
But only when the pain is terrible, which it hasn't been in a long time for me. Thank God. So no, I am not suicidical anymore. ^^
It doesn't really feel like giving up to me. Like the last spit to the face of my tormentors, that they can't hurt me anymore, that I am free...
Yes, I have thought death for a long time.