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In which our intrepid author attempts to answer the first hundred
avatar_500 prompts in as few words and with as little seriousness as possible. Each part is under 500 words, and since each part contains twenty-five fics, each fic is an average of 19 words long.
1. Element: “Hey! Mister Avatar! There will be no girlbending my sister!”
“Huh?”
2. Doubt: “Are you sure this is a good idea, Sokka? It looks a little unstable.”
“ It’ll be fine.” He grinned widely, “Trust me.”
A moment later his newly designed canoe had capsized and they were both in the water.
“Why did I have to say that?”
3. Undying: “Why- won’t- that- stupid- spider-fly- die- already!”
“Peace, Katara, it’s a living creature, and you shouldn’t be trying to kill it anyway,”
Her spider-fly swatter hit him square in the face.
4. Obstacle: Azula should have known her father would have spies reading her trash. He waved the crumpled outline of her as-of-yet-not-so-grand plan for getting rid of Zuko. “This is very wrong of you, Azula.” But he winked, and she couldn’t keep her face straight as she hung her head.
She burned everything after that.
5. Tyrant: Tuktu had to go to the bathroom really bad, seriously!
“No potty breaks!”
Meanie.
6. Outdo: “Face it, Sokka, Haru’s sand sculpture of Suki’s just better than yours.”
7. Neglect: “Professor Roku, Zuko forgot to feed the fish. I think the Unagi’s dying.”
“ No fair, Azula, you said you’d feed them!”
8. Token: “Come on, Sokka.”
“But I’m just one token away from winning a stuffed rabbaroo!”
Come on, Sokka.”
9. Honor: “I must regain my honor.”
Firelord Zuko stared in horror at his son. “No! Bad Idea!”
10. Monk: “I don’t care what they taught you in the Air Temples; I married you expecting to have sex!”
11. Teach: “Dad, Aunt Katara told me to ask you what what a pompous cretin is.”
12. Devour: Momo plucked the last moon peach right out of Appa’s mouth and showed it off to Aang.
13. Memory: Zuko was going to remember the night before forever. It was perfect, amazing... He leaned over to kiss Mai. It was magi-
“Spirits, you’re breath is awful!”
14. Supernatural: “I swear, if you don’t put that comet down right now, Tui...”
“You take all the fun out of life.”
15. Defeat: “Face it, Haru, Suki just likes Sokka’s sand sculpture better.”
16. Mad: Bumi poked Pakku with a stick, and the waterbender slumped in his chair. “I had to have been out of my mind to join you idiots.”
Bumi poked him again.
17. Stir: “I knew that wasn’t real Water Tribe ceremonial wear, I knew it!”
“Easy there, buddy, the ice is starting to melt.”
“Sokka!”
18. Cut: “Not funny, Hakoda! How would you like it if I shaved off your eyebrows?”
19. Light: Suki leapt into Sokka’s arms and kissed him. “My back!”
“Do you want to die, Sokka?”
20. Spontaneous: Zuko had to find some way to escape music night, any way at all-
Splash.
“Someone throw him a life preserver!”
21. Crack: “Absolutely no more secret tunnels!”
22. Knight: The ostrich-horse charged right through the cart.
“My cabbages!”
23. Soothe: “Seriously, Aang, it’s not like it’s that bad Appa turned out to be a girl.”
24. Contest: “I give up! That is the most insane-”
“Ha! I win!” Sokka crowed.
Katara rolled her eyes.
25. Jail: “Why is it every time I go anywhere with you we end up in jail?”
“Just lucky that way, Sugar Queen.”
26. Glow: “So.” Katara smiled nervously. “Zuko and I have been seeing each other...”
Aang glowed.
27. Sky: “So, you thought about what you want to do now that the war’s over?” Jet’s whole face stretched in a grin.
Smellerbee eyed him suspiciously. “Why?”
He pointed at the blimp floating closer and closer to the beach. “How do you guys feel about sky piracy?”
28. Free: “But Katara, samples!”
“No!
29. Travel: Sokka threw his arm around Zuko’s shoulder. “So, I hear you have a cruse ship.”
30. Pirate: “So long as bargains are your inclination...”
The Avatar, the Firelord, Katara, and Sokka all turned to the voice. “Get ‘em!”
31. Mirror: Toph stared dejectedly at her reflection. “I’m so ugly.”
Sokka patted her back. “No you’re n-”
“Ahahahahah!”
“Why do you do that?”
32. Empty: “Aw, that was my last piece of seal jerky.”
33. Trust: “I’m not too sure about this-”
“Just fall, princy.”
34. Red: “Aw, that’s so cute, Twinkletoes is blushing!”
“You can’t even tell, Toph!”
35. Water: “So thirsty...” Sokka’s lip wobbled.
“Not sharing my juice.”
36. Lost: “So you set fire to your own fleet.”
Zhao glared.
“And you let the Avatar slip though your fingers.” Zuko kept his face straight.
Zhao glared harder.
37. Feel: The Duke rubbed his sore arm. “I think she likes me!”
Toph swept his feet out from under him.
38. Road: The best part of traveling without Aang was that Toph got to walk. “You need to watch where this thing’s going!” she yelled at the carriage driver. “You want me to tell the town soldiers you ran me down?”
Walk, and extort money.
39. Captive: “Hey cutie!”
Sokka tugged at the bonds. “Um, I’m still seeing Suki.”
Ty Lee patted his head.
40. Give: “Give it back, Katara!”
She held the boomerang high. “Who’s going to make me? Mom?”
41. Window: Zuko stared out the window, because whenever he looked anywhere else in the beach house, he saw that stupid picture of Li and Lo.
42. Music: Aang sat down next to Zuko and grinned wickedly. “So. Music night.”
43. Never: Mai poked Suki. “Never let Ty Lee get the washroom first in the morning.”
44. Yellow: The pirate held it up. “It’s tasty, it’s yellow, obviously, it’s-”
“A cupcake.”
45. Earth: “I’m telling ya,” Toph grinned. “The earth’s hollow. I can feel it.”
Zuko glanced down at her. “I don’t believe you for a second.”
46. Hold: “Hold this for a second.”
Sokka pushed her back. “No way! I know that trick. I’ll be carrying it all day.”
47. Charm: “Hello ladies!” The girls started giggling and smiling at him slyly. Sokka loved Wang Fire!
48. Finish: “Are you going to finish that?”
The new Firelord looked at the teacake, then at his uncle, then to his friends, and back at the cake before he shoved it over to his uncle in exasperation.
49. Lake: “Hey, lake people!” Chong waved at the Dai Li agents scrambling out of their base.
50. Return: Almost a year after the comet came, his boomerang fell out of the sky and smashed into his head.
51. Door: Kuei sulked. “Why does everybody break down my fancy door?”
52. Party: “You have a political party now.”
“You checked out our platform? We want to build a water rumble stadium-”
Katara sighed. “Don’t you think the South Pole’s a little small for political parties?”
53. Rules: Ty Lee sighed. “Rule #174- I’m not allowed to tell new Kyoshi Warriors to refer to me as ‘Controller of the Horizontal and Vertical.’”
54. Blue: “Oh no, Sokka’s lips are blue, Aang, start bending air into his lungs!”
Sokka licked his lips. “Those blue berries are really good!”
55. Fire: After the others were asleep, Sokka nudged his sister. “You going to tell ‘em Nini’s alive and got three kids?”
56. Celebrate: Zuko and Toph stared morosely at the bar. Sokka clapped them both on the back. “So what are you two ladies celebrating?”
57. Mercy: “Uncle!” Zuko yelled at last, and Sokka let go of his arm.
“Yes, Nephew?”
58. Silence: Zuko blinked. “...What did I say?”
59. Escape: “Mai, have you seen my nephew? I was hoping he would play the tsungi horn tonight.”
“He’s hiding behind the curtain.”
“Traitor.”
60. Fanatic: “We’re not eating the meat raw, just because you don’t like fire, Jet.”
61. Speech: Smellerbee glared at Longshot. “You’re not allowed to accept any more invitations to speak at banquets. Ever.”
62. Anonymous: Mai rolled her eyes. “You can’t be my secret admirer if we’re married.”
63. Between: “Hey Sokka, I think you’re between a rock and a hard place.”
“Just get me out of this hole.
64. Green: “Why is everybody laughing?” Toph stomped her foot. No one answered. “You changed my clothes out with pink ones again, didn’t you?”
65. Air: Aang blew a steady stream of air at Toph’s ear. “Stop it.”
He inhaled. She elbowed him in the stomach.
66. Regret: The vase fell. Sokka looked at Iroh apologetically.
Suki put her head on the table. “This is why we can’t have nice things!”
67. World: “So.” Toph sat down next to Zuko. “What’s up with Sozin? Did he just wake up and decide ‘I’m gonna take over the world’?”
“What’s up with Chin the Conqueror? Did he just-”
“Okay!”
68. Revisit: The bus rolled onwards. “And this is where the Avatar defeated the drill...”
69. Temple: “You think I could make a fire dragon next?” Aang chirped.
Zuko rubbed his temples.
70. Chakra: “Chakras, chakras, everybody loves chakras!”
“Sokka! What made you think giving Aang cactus juice was a good idea?”
71. Equal: It was a day of great pride for Sangook and his people when he was finally ready to fight a sea sponge.
72. Patience: "Patience grasshopper-moth. In time, she will come to you."
"Uh, Uncle Sokka, are you sure you really know all about girls?"
73. Revolt: "What is the meaning of this mutiny?"
"You are going to attend music night, Nephew, if I have to tie you down and sit on you."
74. Isolation: "Come on, Dad, I need stimulation, I'm socially isolated, I'm-"
"Not going to that party, Ikki."
75. Thrill: "Ty Lee No! No giving the children skydiving lessons!"
76. Space: "Aren't the stars lovely tonight?"
"I don't know, Sokka, I'm blind."
77. Lotus: "Tenzin, I think I tied my legs in a knot."
78. Truce: "You're supposed to be training."
"The spinning gates and I have called a truce, and I for one don't want to be the one to break it."
79. Tomb: "Seriously? Appa's funeral had a pavilion made of flowers. All I want is-"
"I'm not building you a pagoda for your turtle-duck."
80. Tryst: Iroh brought his lips close to the edge of the cup. "Don't worry, tea, I would never abandon you. That coffee was a one time mistake."
81. Kind: "I kind of promised Suki I would only do activities with her."
82. Greed: Momo ran past with every moon peach in the orchard precariously balanced in bis arms, Appa swallowing each as they fell.
83. Loyalty: "I told you, Boomerang always comes back."
84. Hide: "We're not living at the South Pole. I can't take all the dead animal skins."
85. Creep: "Is it just me, or are some hobbies just naturally creepy? I mean puppets?"
86. Mood: "Can you really call him moody if we've only seen him have one mood in two years?"
"I say we slip some cactus juice into his tea."
"I say we hit him on the head, dump him overboard, and sail back to the Fire Nation."
"Good plan."
87. Lie: "The prince doesn't sleep lying down. He perches on the smokestack. Like a viper-eagle, eye's open, ready to strike."
"Shut up, he'll hear you!"
88. Circle: "I don't think those dolphin-sharks are here to make friends."
89. Look: "Mommy mommy mommy, look at what I can do!"
"No Meelo! Stop hanging from the ceiling."
90. Find: "Look at this mummified monkey's paw I found, Nephew. Isn't it stylish?"
The crew stood arrayed around it in mystified disgust, and for once, they were all allied with their commander as he hurled it as far into the water as he could.
91. Character: Bolin yelled and grabbed his brother's arm. "I told you, Air Temple Island is full of cannibals!"
"Meelo, stop chewing on his foot."
92. Stare: "Toph won't stop staring at me. It's creepy."
"She can't even see, Sokka."
93. Glass: "MY GLASSWARES!"
94. Weak: "Leave the jokes to us, honey, really."
95. Knock: "You know Toph, we need to find another way for you to show affection before the baby's born."
96. Run: "I told you, the South Pole is too small for political parties, and it's definitely too small for fancy campaigns!"
97. Truth: "Stop making nasty faces, Amon. Your face'll get stuck that way."
98. Whisper: "Zuko, you need to learn how to speak softly and carry a big rock."
"I'm not sure that would work..."
99. Wise: "Thank you for your wisdom, Master Zuko." Korra bowed.
As Korra walked away, Katara turned to her friend. "The day she learns to sort out your advice from your sense of humor, she will have achieved true mastery."
100. Betray: Toph gasped at her daughter in horror. "What do you mean you want to follow the rules?"
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1. Element: “Hey! Mister Avatar! There will be no girlbending my sister!”
“Huh?”
2. Doubt: “Are you sure this is a good idea, Sokka? It looks a little unstable.”
“ It’ll be fine.” He grinned widely, “Trust me.”
A moment later his newly designed canoe had capsized and they were both in the water.
“Why did I have to say that?”
3. Undying: “Why- won’t- that- stupid- spider-fly- die- already!”
“Peace, Katara, it’s a living creature, and you shouldn’t be trying to kill it anyway,”
Her spider-fly swatter hit him square in the face.
4. Obstacle: Azula should have known her father would have spies reading her trash. He waved the crumpled outline of her as-of-yet-not-so-grand plan for getting rid of Zuko. “This is very wrong of you, Azula.” But he winked, and she couldn’t keep her face straight as she hung her head.
She burned everything after that.
5. Tyrant: Tuktu had to go to the bathroom really bad, seriously!
“No potty breaks!”
Meanie.
6. Outdo: “Face it, Sokka, Haru’s sand sculpture of Suki’s just better than yours.”
7. Neglect: “Professor Roku, Zuko forgot to feed the fish. I think the Unagi’s dying.”
“ No fair, Azula, you said you’d feed them!”
8. Token: “Come on, Sokka.”
“But I’m just one token away from winning a stuffed rabbaroo!”
Come on, Sokka.”
9. Honor: “I must regain my honor.”
Firelord Zuko stared in horror at his son. “No! Bad Idea!”
10. Monk: “I don’t care what they taught you in the Air Temples; I married you expecting to have sex!”
11. Teach: “Dad, Aunt Katara told me to ask you what what a pompous cretin is.”
12. Devour: Momo plucked the last moon peach right out of Appa’s mouth and showed it off to Aang.
13. Memory: Zuko was going to remember the night before forever. It was perfect, amazing... He leaned over to kiss Mai. It was magi-
“Spirits, you’re breath is awful!”
14. Supernatural: “I swear, if you don’t put that comet down right now, Tui...”
“You take all the fun out of life.”
15. Defeat: “Face it, Haru, Suki just likes Sokka’s sand sculpture better.”
16. Mad: Bumi poked Pakku with a stick, and the waterbender slumped in his chair. “I had to have been out of my mind to join you idiots.”
Bumi poked him again.
17. Stir: “I knew that wasn’t real Water Tribe ceremonial wear, I knew it!”
“Easy there, buddy, the ice is starting to melt.”
“Sokka!”
18. Cut: “Not funny, Hakoda! How would you like it if I shaved off your eyebrows?”
19. Light: Suki leapt into Sokka’s arms and kissed him. “My back!”
“Do you want to die, Sokka?”
20. Spontaneous: Zuko had to find some way to escape music night, any way at all-
Splash.
“Someone throw him a life preserver!”
21. Crack: “Absolutely no more secret tunnels!”
22. Knight: The ostrich-horse charged right through the cart.
“My cabbages!”
23. Soothe: “Seriously, Aang, it’s not like it’s that bad Appa turned out to be a girl.”
24. Contest: “I give up! That is the most insane-”
“Ha! I win!” Sokka crowed.
Katara rolled her eyes.
25. Jail: “Why is it every time I go anywhere with you we end up in jail?”
“Just lucky that way, Sugar Queen.”
26. Glow: “So.” Katara smiled nervously. “Zuko and I have been seeing each other...”
Aang glowed.
27. Sky: “So, you thought about what you want to do now that the war’s over?” Jet’s whole face stretched in a grin.
Smellerbee eyed him suspiciously. “Why?”
He pointed at the blimp floating closer and closer to the beach. “How do you guys feel about sky piracy?”
28. Free: “But Katara, samples!”
“No!
29. Travel: Sokka threw his arm around Zuko’s shoulder. “So, I hear you have a cruse ship.”
30. Pirate: “So long as bargains are your inclination...”
The Avatar, the Firelord, Katara, and Sokka all turned to the voice. “Get ‘em!”
31. Mirror: Toph stared dejectedly at her reflection. “I’m so ugly.”
Sokka patted her back. “No you’re n-”
“Ahahahahah!”
“Why do you do that?”
32. Empty: “Aw, that was my last piece of seal jerky.”
33. Trust: “I’m not too sure about this-”
“Just fall, princy.”
34. Red: “Aw, that’s so cute, Twinkletoes is blushing!”
“You can’t even tell, Toph!”
35. Water: “So thirsty...” Sokka’s lip wobbled.
“Not sharing my juice.”
36. Lost: “So you set fire to your own fleet.”
Zhao glared.
“And you let the Avatar slip though your fingers.” Zuko kept his face straight.
Zhao glared harder.
37. Feel: The Duke rubbed his sore arm. “I think she likes me!”
Toph swept his feet out from under him.
38. Road: The best part of traveling without Aang was that Toph got to walk. “You need to watch where this thing’s going!” she yelled at the carriage driver. “You want me to tell the town soldiers you ran me down?”
Walk, and extort money.
39. Captive: “Hey cutie!”
Sokka tugged at the bonds. “Um, I’m still seeing Suki.”
Ty Lee patted his head.
40. Give: “Give it back, Katara!”
She held the boomerang high. “Who’s going to make me? Mom?”
41. Window: Zuko stared out the window, because whenever he looked anywhere else in the beach house, he saw that stupid picture of Li and Lo.
42. Music: Aang sat down next to Zuko and grinned wickedly. “So. Music night.”
43. Never: Mai poked Suki. “Never let Ty Lee get the washroom first in the morning.”
44. Yellow: The pirate held it up. “It’s tasty, it’s yellow, obviously, it’s-”
“A cupcake.”
45. Earth: “I’m telling ya,” Toph grinned. “The earth’s hollow. I can feel it.”
Zuko glanced down at her. “I don’t believe you for a second.”
46. Hold: “Hold this for a second.”
Sokka pushed her back. “No way! I know that trick. I’ll be carrying it all day.”
47. Charm: “Hello ladies!” The girls started giggling and smiling at him slyly. Sokka loved Wang Fire!
48. Finish: “Are you going to finish that?”
The new Firelord looked at the teacake, then at his uncle, then to his friends, and back at the cake before he shoved it over to his uncle in exasperation.
49. Lake: “Hey, lake people!” Chong waved at the Dai Li agents scrambling out of their base.
50. Return: Almost a year after the comet came, his boomerang fell out of the sky and smashed into his head.
51. Door: Kuei sulked. “Why does everybody break down my fancy door?”
52. Party: “You have a political party now.”
“You checked out our platform? We want to build a water rumble stadium-”
Katara sighed. “Don’t you think the South Pole’s a little small for political parties?”
53. Rules: Ty Lee sighed. “Rule #174- I’m not allowed to tell new Kyoshi Warriors to refer to me as ‘Controller of the Horizontal and Vertical.’”
54. Blue: “Oh no, Sokka’s lips are blue, Aang, start bending air into his lungs!”
Sokka licked his lips. “Those blue berries are really good!”
55. Fire: After the others were asleep, Sokka nudged his sister. “You going to tell ‘em Nini’s alive and got three kids?”
56. Celebrate: Zuko and Toph stared morosely at the bar. Sokka clapped them both on the back. “So what are you two ladies celebrating?”
57. Mercy: “Uncle!” Zuko yelled at last, and Sokka let go of his arm.
“Yes, Nephew?”
58. Silence: Zuko blinked. “...What did I say?”
59. Escape: “Mai, have you seen my nephew? I was hoping he would play the tsungi horn tonight.”
“He’s hiding behind the curtain.”
“Traitor.”
60. Fanatic: “We’re not eating the meat raw, just because you don’t like fire, Jet.”
61. Speech: Smellerbee glared at Longshot. “You’re not allowed to accept any more invitations to speak at banquets. Ever.”
62. Anonymous: Mai rolled her eyes. “You can’t be my secret admirer if we’re married.”
63. Between: “Hey Sokka, I think you’re between a rock and a hard place.”
“Just get me out of this hole.
64. Green: “Why is everybody laughing?” Toph stomped her foot. No one answered. “You changed my clothes out with pink ones again, didn’t you?”
65. Air: Aang blew a steady stream of air at Toph’s ear. “Stop it.”
He inhaled. She elbowed him in the stomach.
66. Regret: The vase fell. Sokka looked at Iroh apologetically.
Suki put her head on the table. “This is why we can’t have nice things!”
67. World: “So.” Toph sat down next to Zuko. “What’s up with Sozin? Did he just wake up and decide ‘I’m gonna take over the world’?”
“What’s up with Chin the Conqueror? Did he just-”
“Okay!”
68. Revisit: The bus rolled onwards. “And this is where the Avatar defeated the drill...”
69. Temple: “You think I could make a fire dragon next?” Aang chirped.
Zuko rubbed his temples.
70. Chakra: “Chakras, chakras, everybody loves chakras!”
“Sokka! What made you think giving Aang cactus juice was a good idea?”
71. Equal: It was a day of great pride for Sangook and his people when he was finally ready to fight a sea sponge.
72. Patience: "Patience grasshopper-moth. In time, she will come to you."
"Uh, Uncle Sokka, are you sure you really know all about girls?"
73. Revolt: "What is the meaning of this mutiny?"
"You are going to attend music night, Nephew, if I have to tie you down and sit on you."
74. Isolation: "Come on, Dad, I need stimulation, I'm socially isolated, I'm-"
"Not going to that party, Ikki."
75. Thrill: "Ty Lee No! No giving the children skydiving lessons!"
76. Space: "Aren't the stars lovely tonight?"
"I don't know, Sokka, I'm blind."
77. Lotus: "Tenzin, I think I tied my legs in a knot."
78. Truce: "You're supposed to be training."
"The spinning gates and I have called a truce, and I for one don't want to be the one to break it."
79. Tomb: "Seriously? Appa's funeral had a pavilion made of flowers. All I want is-"
"I'm not building you a pagoda for your turtle-duck."
80. Tryst: Iroh brought his lips close to the edge of the cup. "Don't worry, tea, I would never abandon you. That coffee was a one time mistake."
81. Kind: "I kind of promised Suki I would only do activities with her."
82. Greed: Momo ran past with every moon peach in the orchard precariously balanced in bis arms, Appa swallowing each as they fell.
83. Loyalty: "I told you, Boomerang always comes back."
84. Hide: "We're not living at the South Pole. I can't take all the dead animal skins."
85. Creep: "Is it just me, or are some hobbies just naturally creepy? I mean puppets?"
86. Mood: "Can you really call him moody if we've only seen him have one mood in two years?"
"I say we slip some cactus juice into his tea."
"I say we hit him on the head, dump him overboard, and sail back to the Fire Nation."
"Good plan."
87. Lie: "The prince doesn't sleep lying down. He perches on the smokestack. Like a viper-eagle, eye's open, ready to strike."
"Shut up, he'll hear you!"
88. Circle: "I don't think those dolphin-sharks are here to make friends."
89. Look: "Mommy mommy mommy, look at what I can do!"
"No Meelo! Stop hanging from the ceiling."
90. Find: "Look at this mummified monkey's paw I found, Nephew. Isn't it stylish?"
The crew stood arrayed around it in mystified disgust, and for once, they were all allied with their commander as he hurled it as far into the water as he could.
91. Character: Bolin yelled and grabbed his brother's arm. "I told you, Air Temple Island is full of cannibals!"
"Meelo, stop chewing on his foot."
92. Stare: "Toph won't stop staring at me. It's creepy."
"She can't even see, Sokka."
93. Glass: "MY GLASSWARES!"
94. Weak: "Leave the jokes to us, honey, really."
95. Knock: "You know Toph, we need to find another way for you to show affection before the baby's born."
96. Run: "I told you, the South Pole is too small for political parties, and it's definitely too small for fancy campaigns!"
97. Truth: "Stop making nasty faces, Amon. Your face'll get stuck that way."
98. Whisper: "Zuko, you need to learn how to speak softly and carry a big rock."
"I'm not sure that would work..."
99. Wise: "Thank you for your wisdom, Master Zuko." Korra bowed.
As Korra walked away, Katara turned to her friend. "The day she learns to sort out your advice from your sense of humor, she will have achieved true mastery."
100. Betray: Toph gasped at her daughter in horror. "What do you mean you want to follow the rules?"
no subject
Date: 2012-05-10 04:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-10 04:26 am (UTC)