attackfish | Entries tagged with drabble

Disclaimer: I'm dripping drabbles because it's midterms. JKR doesn't have midterms.

Head of House

"If your work continues at its current quality, you will never even pass your O.W.L., much less actually qualify for N.E.W.T. level potions," first year professor Snape snapped at the Slytherin girl. He never humiliated students in his house in front of others, but in detention...

Her face fell, but then she pasted on a coy smile. "Would private tutoring help?"

"Don't be ridiculous, I do not-"

"Perhaps I can convince you... Sevvikins?" Her hand started to stroke his thigh. He yelped and jumped away, resolving to buy robes, and soon.

It was very satisfying to sign her expulsion order.

Disclaimer: JKR is really friendly to fanfiction writers, actually, so long as we make no money from it.

In which Severus considers the relative intelligence of Professor Trelawney and Sirius Black, and finds his colleague wanting.

The Truth about Bats and Dogs

"Ah, Severus, my inner eye tells me you have been avoiding me." He ignored her. "Is it because you're afraid of what I'll see?" he rammed his mashed potato covered fork into his peas so they stuck like sprinkles to ice cream. "Have you, oh, no, have you seen a large black dog? Have you seen a Grim?"

He choked. "Many times, and I'm not dead yet. Now if you don't mind shutting up-"

But Trelawney was used to that. "It hasn't approached you has it?" she asked, eyes particularly insect-like behind her huge glasses.

"He knows better," he snapped.

Author's Note: Something about having papers due makes me spawn drabbles.

Sirius watched Snape watching Lily Evans, his feelings for her evident in his face, even if Evans never seemed to realize. Sirius sneered as Snape glanced his way for a moment, his expression deepening into a glower. Sirius' eyes made their way back to James, and a flash of something like disapointment shot through him that James wasn't looking back, and he felt sick to his stomach with the knowledge that his own love was just as hopeless and just as pathetic as Snape's. James smiled at Evans, and Snape caught Sirius' eyes again, a cold smirk on his face.

Summary (or an excuse to explain what was in the thirty words I had to cut): In which the Weasley twins find out that Remus and Sirius are Moony and Padfoot.

Idle Worship

The Weasley twins passed Snape, standing at the kitchen door, "Hey Snape, have you seen Sirius and Remus?" He glowered at them until they moved away. A door nearby clicked and he looked up in time to see Lupin ducking inside. The twins grinned at each other and hammered on it. Lupin's voice came through muffled, "No, I will not tell you about all the pranks I played. Stop asking!"

"Fred, George, stop hounding them and help me with these curtains," their mother yelled. The two sulked up the stairs. The pantry door creaked open. "Are they gone?" Sirius asked.

Author's Note: well this YA fantasy novel won't get written...

Cats had only one expression, Carlos found, disdain. He plopped the shelter tabby down on his comforter and turned his head, looking at it from every angle. Flexing its claws, the cat padded across the green and yellow quilt squares, leaving brown, orange, and cream hairs all over them. "Hola, como se llama usted?" it meowed.

Carlos staggered backwards as quickly as his legs would carry him. The cat... The cat... "No hablo Espanol," he babbled, exhausting what little Spanish he had learned from movies and kids at school.

The cat licked its paw, eying him contemplatively, "No hablo Ingles."

This is a is a response to a challenge on

thematic_hp

Disclaimer: Nope, still not JKR...

Prompt: #93 (round 11) Computer/Wizard Interface: Welcome to Computer/Wizard Interface (or some other snazzy name). We update your computer to work with magic and your wizading needs. Bonus - some pureblood that would normally be out of their depth with Muggle technology.
Summary: In which Draco runs afoul of former professors and Muggle wire boxes.

Author's Note: Astoria is Astoria Greengrass, a character not mentioned in the books that JKR said marries Draco. She is Daphne Greengrass' (a Slytherin girl in Draco's year mentioned in book five) younger sister.

( Telephone Trees )

Disclaimer: I am not Stephen Sondheim, I am not JKR. When I do have a published story, I will make money from writing all the time, but sadly, not before.

Care for a Shave?

The man with the white streak in his hair and the absurd Victorian vest smiled terrifyingly at Severus, who backed up. “Sir,” he said, words clipped, “I don’t know who this ‘Judge Turpin’ is, but I suggest you dispose of that razor before I hex you.”

He brandished his wand as the man swallowed sourly. “Perhaps later, your honor.”

Severus backed down the street, so unnerved by the overly insistant barber that he didn’t dare take his eyes off him. He turned around alarmed when he bumped into something, and looked down to see a boy offering him a pie.

This is a plot bunny of Laume's that slunk in on its belly, camouflage paint in its fur. It's apparently what her brain did with No Difference.

April Fools

"Ah Severus, I'm glad you came," the headmaster's voice was grim.

"Is there something wrong, headmaster?"

"No, not wrong, precisely," he replied, standing. "Professor Trelawney had an... accident with Miss Granger's Time Turner."

Severus nodded. "What do you need?"

"Nothing like that, Severus, it's only that she spent nearly a year in the past only shortly after her own birth, and before she left, she and Hagrid had become involved..." Severus stared at him nonplussed. "She bore a child, and he was adopted by your parents."

There was a loud thump.

"Dear dear, Severus. You should pay more attention to dates."

This drabble is a somewhat belated birthday present to Cat devout fan of Neil Gaiman and American Gods especially, who desperately needs to write me some fanfiction from the very obscure Chronicles of the Cheysuli. If she does, I will write her another drabble.

Rotate on This

“I have decided in the interests of security, that as our spy, Severus needs a code word should we need to speak about him outside of the confines of this meeting,” Albus Dumbledore told the Order briskly, “so from now on, he is to be referred to as Wednesday.”

The aforementioned Severus sneered, missing the allusion entirely. “Why, pray tell, am I to be known by the name of a day of the week?”

On the other side of the table, Sirius Black lounged indolently in his chair. “It’s very Low Key,” he smirked.

Remus kicked him under the table.

Hey, I can actually blame these on somebody! This post by

lothy gave me the idea for the first drabble, and the first gave me the idea for the second.

I made no attempt what so ever to use Old English, Latin, or any of the numerous Scottish dialects that founders of Hogwarts might have spoken, partly because I'm lazy, partly because I don't know enough, and partly because the drabble is not at all serious.

Disclaimer: If Harry Potter were mine, the books would have a lot more wine, women, and song.

( Parselscript: In which Salazar Slytherin gets drunk )

( Half-Bloods: In which Harry bonds with a blanket )

Disclaimer: If I were JKR... Damn I wish.

( Snape's Laundry )

( The Pight of the Naugas )

( Pillow Talk )

Disclaimer: If I owned these fellows, my life would be too interesting to bother with fanfiction.

Summaries (in order of drabble):

1. In which Regetti splits hairs… er tentacles.
2. In which Elizabeth Swan makes Pintel’s day.
3. In which James Norrington realizes what he’s afraid of.
4. In which Mr. Gibbs confronts Davy Jones’ darkest fear.
5. In which Jack Sparrow and Mr. Gibbs reminisce.
6. In which the crabs feature prominently.
7. In which Lily and Calypso bond.
8. In which Snape runs afoul of anachronistic muggle cultural references.
9. As does Sirius.

Author's Note: I watched Pirates of the Caribbean 3 for the first time a few days ago and here's the result, a drabble for each of the pieces of eight. alright, so three of them are crossovers and one is almost entirely quotes, but the pieces of eight weren't real pieces of eight anyway.

( One Hundred Years Before the Mast )

( Often, Often )

( Secret Softy )

( Many Jacks )

( Sea Turtles )

And here there be crossovers...

( Girls' Night Out )

( I Knew He Reminded Me of Someone )

( Who Does that Make Barbossa? )

In which I try shallowly and cruelly to make the death of adolescents funny

Disclaimer: I'm not affiliated with J.K. Rowling or any other assorted individuals who can lay claim to the Harry Potter universe

( Ectoplasm Means True Love )

In which Filch and Umbridge learn they have something in common

Disclaimer: I am not affiliated with the Police, and they would likely be less upset than I at what I did with their song title. I also own nothing in the Harry Potter universe, and if I did own Umbridge and Filch, I'd I'd give them to the first idiot willing to take them.

( Don’t Stand so Close to Me )

Summery: : 300 words of krak

Disclaimer: if I owned these fellows, my account would be paid

( Actually, it's a Cephalopod )

( Petty Tyranny )

( Nordic Beauty )

In which the part of Severus Snape will be played by Daffy Duck, or possibly the other way around.

This is blatantly ripped off this cartoon from 1951.

Disclaimer: I'm not affiliated with Warner Brothers, J.K. Rowling, or any other assorted individuals who own some claim to either the cartoon or the Harry Potter universe.

( You’re Despicable )